Earlier this week I had a mentorship call with a gentleman I’m working with.
I’ve been mentoring him with his business and personal development for almost three years now. Helping him develop the mindset and discipline to win in his endeavor.
We laid out a plan for what he wants to accomplish over the course of the next 6 months to take his business to the next level. Part of that plan involves checking in with him every day to see his progress, and offer guidance to help him stay on track.
Typically, he does well with his activity, but this time he didn’t do so well. I had to have a real heart to heart talk with him, man to man. No fluff or motivation, just clear cut to the point real talk.
We had to address why he hadn’t executed as he should that day, and what he needs to do if he’s really serious about the goal he wants to accomplish in the next 6 months.
While talking with him I could really feel my passion for him to win coming out in my voice, because of how much I believe in him. I got really emotional. Like that scene in a movie when the coach is talking to his team how ‘they’re going to go back out there and win this game’ type emotional.
I told him “Listen you have to choose, how badly do you want this? Reasons why you didn’t get it done or Results. Excuses or Execution? You have to decide, but you can’t have both!“
“Listen, success is hard…it’s hard! It takes a lot! And that’s why most people can’t handle the process! As a matter of fact most people shouldn’t because it’s hard, and it takes a lot out of you! Most people won’t know how to handle that!“
While talking with him in that moment, in my mind, I said to myself, “Shit! This really is hard!“
Like really hard.
It’s long hours. It’s giving up having a social life. At times even time with family. It’s giving up having intimate relationships right now, and even if you do have one, many times you’ll have to give up spending time with that person to work on your dream. It’s lonely and depressing, and often emotionally and mentally frustrating. No one understands.
People have committed suicide traveling this path.
It ain’t no joke!
I don’t think most people actually understand the level of sacrifice, pain, and mental and emotional strain it takes to truly be successful at anything. It takes a certain level of mental and emotional toughness to make it.
In a flash the thought of how hard it is took me back to how far I’ve really come in my personal growth and journey.
To be honest I can empathize with him and everyone else, because I remember that was me a few years ago. I procrastinated on tasks, I was inconsistent, I always had excuses and reasons why I didn’t get things done.
Compared to now when my mindset, hunger, drive, and discipline is so incredible, it’s almost inhuman, even scary.
As I started writing this post it’s 1am in the morning. I have work in a few hours, and also have to get my daughter ready for daycare before heading to work. I’ve only had 4 hours sleep and I doubt I’m getting anymore sleep tonight.
I woke up in the middle of the night thinking to myself “I need to get this article written for later today.“
Another thought came “Nah, just roll back over and go back to sleep. You can always do it tomorrow.“
I almost got angry at the second voice. How dare he suggest that I go back to sleep when I need to get this article written?
Before it would have been too easy for me to allow myself to slip into the comfort of sleep.
I would have loved to sleep in some more. It would be warranted because of how tired I am. Still, for some reason the drive to win just wouldn’t let me. These days I have to force myself to sleep just to get some rest, because if I’m not careful I’ll literally push myself to the breaking point.
I know most people won’t understand, and that’s okay.
I’ve even been called weird recently by someone because I choose work rather than going out and having fun. I’ve been in job interviews where I’m looked on strange because I told them my hobbies are listening to marketing podcasts until 1am in the morning, and watching interviews of successful people on YouTube.
Like I said, they won’t understand, and they’re not suppose to.
However, here’s one thing I do understand: The pain of success or the pain of regret.
That’s the part most don’t get.
I can’t have both, I have to choose which one I’m willing to endure.
The pain of success means making the sacrifices now to get the life I want later. It means waking up in the middle of the night to put in the work, even when the temptation to sleep comes, because I made a commitment to get it done no matter how I feel. It means when your good friend calls you up to go watch the Jamaican versus USA football match at 7pm at night, while you’re still at work, you’re response is you can’t because you’re on the grind.
It’s making the sacrifice now, for the best life later.
On the opposite end, the pain of regret means doing everything I want to do now, and having to live with the regret later of why my life didn’t turn out how I wanted it to. However, in that moment I’ll have no one to blame but myself.
If I truly want to win, then I have to make the sacrifice, to endure the temporary pain of success now, to have success later.
Anyway, let me wrap up this article, because I’ve got other things I need to work on.
As I said this life isn’t for everyone, I get it. I would even go as far as to recommend that most people shouldn’t choose it, because it can be too much to endure, and most people can’t.
For those of you reading this who have chosen it I want to say to you:
1. Keep at it, it’s hard now but from the small taste of it I’ve gotten…it’s worth it
2. Don’t feel bad because no one understands why you’re doing what you’re doing. They’re not going to understand and they’re not suppose to. Stop trying to help them understand. Just do you. The reality of it all will play out in your favour in the end
What Am I Grateful For About This Situation?
I’m grateful that I’m at a place right now where I’ve developed greatly in my mindset and discipline. That I’m strong enough to endure the pain of success to make my dreams a reality.
What Did I Learn From This Situation?
It was more a reminder of why I do what I do, but also why this life isn’t meant for everyone…and that’s okay.
How Can I Use This In The Future To Become Better?
I want to use it to become better, strengthen my mindset and discipline, and build upon what’s there. I’m excited to see what the next 2-3 years of personal growth will look like for me.
Follow my journey as I document everything on my Journey 2 Mastery™ as it unfolds.
Read my last entry on moving past your feelings and emotions for success.
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